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Saturday, January 23, 2016

Talking about the Passion


  • : a strong feeling of enthusiasm or excitement for something or about doing something
  • : a strong feeling (such as anger) that causes you to act in a dangerous way
  • : a strong sexual or romantic feeling for someone

I've been thinking a lot about "Passion".  I have a friend that works over Tampa Bay Downs as a "hot walker" and is working on getting her trainer's license.  The intensity she has when talking about horses is laser focused.  She is up at 4 AM every morning to work with the horses, getting them ready for the day's races.  Working in the cold, the rain, the heat and humidity of the summer.  

At the end of the season here in Tampa she'll drive down to Miami, where they run all year round and start all over again.   All for the passion and love of horses and racing.

I have several interests.  We had a small garden out back at one time, growing our own fruits and veggies.  I read up on wine and foods and go exploring...trying different combinations, different cultures.  Frankly I was into craft beers and good food long before they became the staple of tv shows and could be found on every corner.

Soccer, at one time, was a passion of mine.  I watched it on Spanish language channels even though I did not speak Spanish.  I wrote about it, actually being paid by some websites to contribute material to them.  I didn't make much but for a while I was in fact, a paid sportswriter.  However as interest in the sport has grown, my interest has waned.  

At one time I was serious writer, and an rabid reader; reading whatever I could get my grubby hands on.  Wherever it be pulp fiction, hard fiction or some rare find.  I blame the Thief's Journal for several months of drunken debauchery in all it's glorious forms. I was a writer damn it and I was going to self destruct like all the great one's did. 

So in a way, it's sad to see the various stories that I've started not finished or revised wasting away either in my head or in various journals and files.  

I do love riding Kimmie, my beloved bike and writing about those adventures in my blog.  However that too, has fallen to the wayside as I deal with everything else in my life.  I have no passion for it anymore.  I am out of excuses.

My job I have no passion for, although it seems to be my ticket to a better and more fulfilling life.  I am, finally, where I want to be and doing what I have always thought I could do career wise.  

Is it any wonder that I look on with wide eyed wonder as she talks about horses and lip chains and "natural training" methods.  I used to have that passion about sport, writing, books, art, science and philosophy.

How did I let the world beat me down?

How does one rekindle that fire?  That Passion for life?   For living?

No, I'm not depressed.  I'm far from it actually, but I can not help but wonder where that wide eyed joy and wonder went to?

What does one do to reignite a flame?

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